Gay Leather Night

So, just in case we all weren't aware, I am a girl. One with fairly large breasts and an ass and hips - all those secondary sex characteristics that make 90% of society able to correctly identify the gender of the human being they are looking at.

So, last Thursday, I was booked to dance at a queer leather dance night. And you know what? I had no business being there.

First off, what does a girl who has a closet full of 60s dressed and befringed costumes wear to a leather party? Honestly, I don't know. I know the horrible 70s stereotypes and I happen to have a gay roommate who has played that stereotype so with some guidance (and accessories) from him here is where I ended up:

Right? Maybe? I don't know.

But here is the thing. I want you to close your eyes and think about the advertising that went in to gay leather night at my bar. Now I want you to guess who came. Now I want you to think about how awkward it was when these men came to see the go go dancer on gay leather night and there I am, dancing to remixes of the Spice Girls on my box, all boobs and X chromosomes.

eesh.

So eventually 2 male go go dancers DID show up. Let's talk about that. We are always cautioned when buying/making/putting on costumes that we CANNOT look like a strip club dancer. We need to always have fishnets on - no bare legs. We must look retro and classy and sexy. And I am fine with that, don't get me wrong. But I do wonder what could be when I know I make more money in fringy bras rather than dresses or disco pants.

And then these male dancers show up, literally wearing nothing more than some banana hammocks and baby oil. And they have BUCKETS for their tip jars, since they physically couldn't keep all the dollars stuffed into their crotches in said crotch and needed to dump it out. 

Now why is that ok? Listen, I don't want people shoving money in my crotch. But I do think it is curious that the reputation of the bar stems solely at how properly dressed the female dancers are but the dudes can stand outside smoking in a thong and that's just business as usual.

It was a super awkward night. I danced for about 3 solid hours before I made my one (and only) tip of the night, and it was from the DJ who I am pretty sure felt bad for me.

The next day I asked about the situation: why on earth was there a girl dancer at all? Because we didn't want to "alienate the straight customer"

boo to that.